The title here comes from something my wife and I witnessed. Driving along a very busy road one day, we were forced to pull around a car stopped in the middle of traffic. As we passed, we saw the driver, an older man, dangling his foot out the door and tying his shoe. We laughed. Could it be that this dolt actually stopped and held up traffic to tie his *%#@^& shoe? Sure looked that way. Regardless, it brings to light the existence of another segment of our society: The Clueless.
You’ve seen them, the people who blankly push past you in the store, oblivious to how they nearly hip checked you into the frozen peas. Or those pleasant folks who endlessly talk at you about their troubles, and barely seem to be listening when you speak (and you know they’re simply waiting for your lips to stop moving).
The clueless among us are everywhere. And they pose a threat. All kidding aside, how is progress going to be made in areas like work/life integration, when, for example, your boss thinks that work/life integration means giving you the choice of eating your lunch at 12 or 12:15? Or allowing you to work an hour later each night instead of coming in to work on Saturday?
I interviewed at a mid-sized tech company a few years back comprised of nearly all men. And although I hear that single, older female managers often present the most resistance to the younger generation’s quest for balance, let’s not give men a free pass. The man who interviewed me, let’s call him Jack (short for jackass), seemed like a nice guy. We bonded quickly, talking about the industry, his home town, then sports (of course). Then the topic came up, somehow, of women employees. Jack didn’t really know who I was, or who I knew, but he felt confident that he could open up to me (I assume because he and I shared the same type of genitals?). He said, quite openly, that he was able to offer less money to female employees, and also that he made it a point to avoid hiring women who were in their child-bearing years. I kid you not, I’m not fabricating this for illustration. Since women have kids in their 20’s, 30’s, 40’s and sometimes even 50’s, it’s easy to understand why there were virtually no women in this company. Sad. Infuriating. But par for the course, I’m sure, for more than a few managers out there. You know, the clueless ones whose vision extends about as far out as next week.
So, my fellow work/life strugglers, the struggle is long from over. It’s just beginning in many respects. There are a lot of Jacks, and Jackies, out there to overcome. And although, at times, you may have the overwhelming urge to smack these people upside their misshapen heads, I advise you to take a deep breath and trust that change is coming. Understand, though, that long-term, systemic change doesn’t happen overnight.
But that doesn’t mean you should sit idly waiting to be thrown a crumb. Nor should you throw your hands up in frustrated defeat. Never give up, you women and men of vision. This struggle is one that’s far too important. And you know it.
Visit http://lifeworkalliance.com to do something about it.
Tags: child, children, dad, employment, kids, parent, parents, raising kids, work, work life balance, work life integration, working, working mom, working mother
Great blog Dad! Love the part about Jack and Jackies, I come across many of those myself in and out of my work life. There is a lot of talk involving work-life integration in magazines, blogs, etc, but I appreciate your blog, and the others I see on your site, that tackle the issue from a fresh perspective. Well done. I look forward to reading future posts.
-Janice
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